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Writer's pictureDefunkt Magazine

fucking while broken

By Carina Stopenski



bit lip split lip

i have waited for you

buck your hips

i’m sorry

that i can’t move mountains for you


i won’t tell you how

my body aches

every time you rail my cunt

because we’re both having

so much fun


asking is this okay

tell me what you want

let me service you

i am dead fish flopping

please do all the work


i tell you to pull my hair

draw my blood

do what you can

for me to forget

how badly it hurts

just to live


let me take care of you


i wish you knew

what you have gotten yourself into


you say keep going

and i’m trying so hard


but my body

can’t keep up




silicon assistant

feeling between fingers

you moan

into my neck

and i can feel the scars

from your sickness


do they call you resilient too


or do they expect you to be healed

after they depulped you

turned you from tumor to crater


medically-mandated gentleness


tear open my womb

unravel my insides

make me hollow


pull us apart wet sticky

whose blood is this

can you tell me

can you

help me forget

is this okay

let me take care of you


gather all my pieces

you’re the only one here

strong enough

____________________________________________________________________________________________

Carina Stopenski (they/them) is a writer, librarian, and educator based in Pittsburgh, PA. They hold a BFA in Creative Writing from Chatham University, an MSLS in Library Science from Clarion University, and an MA in Literary and Cultural Studies from Carnegie Mellon University. Their work focuses on queerness, disembodiment, and transhumanism. Carina's poetry has most recently been featured in The Closed Eye Open, Silver Rose Magazine, and the anthology Beyond Queer Words, among others.


Enjoyed Carina's work? Send a tip straight to their Venmo: @Carina-Stopenski


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